These Days

Somehow I'm still getting used to these days, these days when the rain falls and the pain fills.

And it's more than just the physical. Yes, it's hard to learn to live in these days, when you have to say no and literally sit on the sidelines because it would hurt to play the game. But what's really hard is learning how to live in relation with the Father when this thorn pierces deeply.

What do I ask of Him, and how? The persistent widow was rewarded for her nagging spirit, and yet will not His grace show itself sufficient to the heart submitted to Him?

Life would be easier without it, but would I know Him so well without it? I at least wouldn't be seeking so diligently.

He, in His sovereignty of course knows best, so I want to keep trusting. But what does trust look like in these days? Does it look like quiet submission - even resignation? Or does it look like persistent belief in a particular display of His mercy?

Many sought the Jesus of the four gospels, for His magnificent healing touch. How many never succeeded in pressing through the crowds? How many did His human form in sovereignty not reach?

Did they leave empty still? Or did they find the One who imparts peace to the soul, even in the midst of pain?