He chose, "rather to be mistreated with the people of God than to enjoy the fleeting pleasures of sin. He considered the reproach of Christ greater wealth than the treasures of Egypt, for he was looking to the reward. By faith, he left Egypt, not being afraid of the anger of the king, for he endured as seeing Him who is invisible" (Hebrews 11:25-27).
This morning dozens in our congregation sat in silence to reflect on the perfect wisdom of God I sang about, and yet I must ask myself - how perfect do I really believe His wisdom is?
There is so much about myself, about this life, that I would change. In His wisdom, though, it's not up to me. "Our limitations are God's opportunities," Pastor David said this morning.
There are things I don't have the power or liberty to change, and those things are the very stage where God displays His unlimited power.
There are things I want to say, but I cannot, so I stand back and trust the Lord to whisper the right words into all the right hearts.
There is this passion for His world that He has given me, but aside from His sovereign hand I cannot act on that passion in any meaningful way. Yet He is always moving - and, oh, how I saw it on Friday, laughing with six African women and playing charades with new English words (more on that display of His power in a later post).
I fell asleep pouring out my heart to Him in the dark last night, and I woke up clinging to His hand, reminding myself that life on this planet requires us to Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale.
YHWH. His name is echoed in the sound of my breath, in the labored sighs, in the groaning that waits for His Son's return.
And my heart slows with every breath, and I catch the eyes of the congregation, nodding in agreement. The last stanza comes strong, because I need to hear it above the noise of my own fear, and they need to hear it too.
O, grant me wisdom from above
To pray for peace, and cling to love.
And teach me humbly to receive
The sun and rain of Your sovereignty.
Each strand of sorrow has a place
Within this tapestry of grace.
So, through the trials I'll choose to say
Your perfect will, in Your perfect way.
And Moses comes back to my mind. "Greater wealth than the treasures of Egypt..." Everything I want to change and everything I want to say and all the action that I don't yet know how to take - there is a greater wealth. I hear it with every inhale, exhale. It's the name of the close One, the One who never changes and yet changes me, the One who speaks when I cannot, and the One who steps ahead of this feeble child so that I know where to go. YHWH.
Just one breath holds greater wealth than all the love of man, the achievements of scholars, and the favour of kings.