My word for 2014. You already know it, but do I?
I so very much want to pick another word, a word I'm already good at, a word that isn't so... hard.
I'm afraid that working on resting this year is like standing up as a way to learn how to sit down. I'm afraid that I'll fail, because I'm already not doing a very good job.
This is a big word. It's big and it's hard and it's going to be like carrying a cement block everywhere I go for twelve months. But it will make me stronger.
Or it will show me how weak and dependent on the Strong One I am. In that case, failing would really be success. Oh, how easily I forget that His kingdom is upside down.
To see it right I need to kick my feet up over the back of the couch and hang my head over the edge. With my hair sweeping the floor maybe I'll finally learn what it is to
Rest.
I don't just mean spending more time in bed and less time running, but teaching my mind to walk, even when my feet do 09:30/mi. Focusing less on doing and more on being. Feeling out the slow rhythm of a life like feeling the weight of gravity pull me to the ground with every step. Everything finding center in Him.
Rest. Not in me, but in Him.
Rest, that in it's deepest essence really blends trust in the sovereignty of God with hope in His goodness and joy in His promises.
I need that kind of rest.
I'm still not entirely sure how to get it, so, this year I'm setting out to learn something I don't really even know how to start.
I'm setting out with a word.
Welcome to 2014.
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